10 Tiny Fingers and 10 Tiny Toes, 2 Little Eyes and A Cute Button Nose.....

As you have probably guessed by now we've been keeping a little bit of a secret! We're expecting Baby Number 2! Oliver is going to be a big brother! And wow its has come as a bit of shock! As some of you may know we've been TTC for the last near enough year and sadly miscarried back in May. 

I had decided to do a test a couple of days before my Hen Party in September because we were obviously trying and I didn't want to end up drinking anything with Alcohol in! So I took the test not really expecting to seed that second little pink lie because We've just had disappointment after disappointment on the TTC front, but there is was clear as day! I couldn't believe it. The one thing we'd been yearning for to be parents again, to say that finally Ollie was going to be promoted to big brother. I've had a few ask Are you hoping for a little girl? My reposnse? I don't care I just want to be holding our beautiful tiny bundle come next spring! 

So there you have it guys are most amazing news! I will be trying to do Pregnancy updates weekly if not fortnightly because I'm sure I'm going to have my work cut out with chasing Ollie whist being busy being pregnant. 

I hope you enjoy following us on our new adventure! 

Pregnancy after loss I've felt is very bittersweet, its scary, its emotional. So far in this  pregnancy I've been pretty overwhelmed with emotion and I have found it hard to shake that something bad may happen. After our first loss back in May we found ourselves pregnant again in September. The overwhelming joy we felt that we were being given another chance for another baby a sibling for Ollie. I then felt such a strong unshakeable wash of anxiety and fear what if things weren't meant to be for a second time. I've cried many times to Ben about what if it happens again? I've already had an emergency scan as well as my 12 week scan because of a bleed at 11 weeks, We were so scared and I'd felt such a wash of fear thinking that this pregnancy was going to end in another miscarriage. There have been times in the last 12 weeks where I've had awful guilt over being pregnant again, not wanting to feel that I'd just forgotten about our angel and moved on. I will always remember our baby we never got to meet he or she will always be in our hearts. 

I hope that this little short post has made some sense to you. Thank you so much for ready and I'll catch you all on my next post! 

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