An Open Letter to Those Who Simply Do Not Understated

To those who simply do not understand my son. You see he’s a bright intelligent happy little soul. He’s got an infectious personality and the biggest heart of anyone you will ever meet. He worships the ground his daddy walks on and adores his baby sister! But deep down he struggles for you see he can not communicate, he cannot express his feelings like most of us can, he cannot speak and tell me he hurts, that he’s sad or he’s upset. Recently those feelings came out in full force on a full to capacity bus full of people. Some of those people were incredible people and helped me, some of those people kept quiet and their opinions to themselves whilst a small group of individuals (that’s just me being polite but this isn’t about me being angry) felt the need to express their disgust, make cruel comments and be little me in front of my children. I’m not going to say I’m sorry but I have nothing that I need to be sorry for but I want to say sometimes thinking before you speak is a very valuable point in what I’m trying to say. Even when I tried to explain how anxious my son gets and he hates situations that are out of his comfort zone but to sit there and tell me that’s he’s too extreme and that I’m a bad parent because I’m letting him “tantrum” broke me beyond belief. We as his parents have given up everything to make sure that him and his sister have the best of everything in this world. My children are fed, warm, entertained, happy and loved which I think makes me far from a bad parent. I’m not saying Oliver is never naughty because we have days where we can be genuinely naughty but he also has moments where others thinking he's being naughty is his only way of communicating. There won’t always be a time where I can protect him from the words of others, moments like these make me want to wrap him up and keep him away from the world but that is no good for him. He needs to be in the world learning how it works if he has any chance when I am no longer her to guide him through life but how can I when people feel the need to make rude disgusting comments. 
I think trying to not let the comments get to me is easier said than done but I will always teach him to walk with his head held high and no matter how much words sometimes hurt they do not define him. 

Father's Day Gift Guide

With Father's Day just around the corner I thought I would do a little guide for the most important men in your and you little peoples lives. I'm going to be showcasing a range of gifts for Dad's, Step-Dad's and Granddad's with all range of interests. 

Experience Days

Not sure what to get for Dad or Grandad? Do they own literally everything possible? What better than an experience day! It's a great way to make some memories that'll last for ever! You can buy experience day from several different including Argos and WHSmiths. There are so many to choose from such as sporting, food and drink, rally experiences, theatre experiences ect..depending on the person's interests. 

Personalised Gifts

Another gift you can't really go wrong with are personalised gifts! So many places do so many awesome personalised gifts! I've actually brought Ben something personalised off the kids again this year but I won't pop a picture of that because I know he reads my blog! I've also ordered a personalised photoframe for my dad from the children too. I had that from Littlewoods and paid £15 for it. I've popped an image below and the link here the image is just a stock image I grabbed from the website and I'm still waiting for mine to come! 

Handmade Gifts 
The next one you can't go wrong with either is handmade gifts! These are great if you don't have a lot of money and are on a budget or if you just want to give something extra special! You can find so many amazing ideas on Pinterest if you need some inspiration I found a couple of ideas that I've tried with Oliver that have turned out to look pretty awesome. I'll pop a link to some of the ideas that I've found on Pinterest because as I said before Ben reads my blog so I don't want to really give anything away for him before Father's Day in a couple of weeks. There are so many things you could do like photo collages as you can pick up frames relitvely cheap from places such as Poundland and home bargains ect and many websites do free prints just pay postage offers, hand and footprints on canvases can also be a cute but on a budget idea if you've got little babies and for bigger children you can pick up a cheap mug, plate or glass and some ceramic or glass paint and get them to design their own mug ect for Daddy/Granddad something that will always be used and always filled with love. 

Poundland also have some really awesome bits in for some novelty purposes too! I picked up one of these mugs that I've popped a picture of down below for my Dad that says "Worlds Best Farter I Mean Father!" which I thought was ace and right on the type of humour that my dad has! I also picked up a couple of photo-frames as gifts too.  I also picked up a hanging sign for my dad that you hang tools on which I think he'll love and will be so useful to pop some bits and bobs on! 

I also picked up Ben his favourite chocolate as a little treat and this spider-man egg cup and toast cutter gift set as I thought it would be cute to make him breakfast on Father's Day morning. 

There are absolutely loads of things you could get for those special men in your life and your children's lives! I hope this post has been helpful for those looking for ideas! 

Learning to Love Me

This one is a bit of a difficult post if I'm honest so it probably going to be a quite raw and emotional post. I am trying to learn to love myself and love my body which is incredibly when you've been pregnant 3 times and have given birth twice. I know I am no supermodel! I am absolutely far from it but why shouldn't I love my body even if I'm on the bigger size. I wrote a post recently over on my Instagram after a picture from my last few days of school popped up my news feed on Facebook - I'll pop the link to that post here and it honestly really stuck a nerve with me! For lots of people Mum's especially their body issues seem to start after they've had kids but mine I think have gone much farther back than that pretty much back to school, I've never been skinny and I never used to be massively fat according to that picture but I always seemed to be a target for bullies, I was made to feel dreadful and worthless and not like a person who has feelings. I got to some pretty low points in my life and I even self harmed and at one point I tried to take my life by overdosing on pills. I never took into account the effect that it could have on those around me, those who actually loved me but I was too hung up on nasty people to think straight I guess now as a Mum I honestly don't know how I could of done that to my parents, how they'd of felt if their daughter had successfully taken her own life and it breaks my heart. I know that I need to change how I not just feel about myself but how I talk about myself, I don't want my kids to hear mummy looking in the mirror telling herself how fat, gross and ugly she is and think that's okay to do and say. I want my kids to hear mummy tell herself actually my hair doesn't look to bad and what I'm wearing looks nice today. I'm just glad that Ben compliments me and says thing to make me feel better everyday and that they both get to hear that and that Ben sets an example of how you should treat people. 

This is me as I am right now. I know I'm not the worst but then I'm not the best and I could sit here a circle everything I hate but I'm know going to. There are things that I need to change and I'm going to be working on that and documenting my progress as I go. I don't want this to be just about me losing weight but also about learning to love myself regardless of how I look. 

Tips For Finding The Right Nursery/Pre-School

So this week Oliver started pre-school and he's absolutely loving it. So I thought I'd do a little post on my top tips on choosing the right place for you and most importantly your child. 

Allergy Policy 
I'm going to start with a big one for us as Oliver is Lactose Intolerant and this was one of our biggest fears was that he was going to end up eating something that he wasn't meant to. One our first questions we asked was how they dealt with Children with allergies. The particular pre-school we've chosen for him will make sure that he's supervised during lunch and snack times so as not to have anything that is not appropriate for him to have which ticked all the boxes from us. When I actually picked him up from one of his settling in sessions it was during snack time and they actually had a member of staff sat with him and he was sat eating his snack with them. 

How Does Your Child React? 
When we went to look around where Ollie goes to pre-school he actually ran off straight away to play and start interacting with people which I was completely taken aback by as Oliver can be very clingy and not sure of situations where he doesn't know anyone so I thought being in a room full of adults and children he doesn't know would make him very clingy and closely guarded but he was the exact opposite. In fact he actually tantrum-ed because we tried to get him to leave to come home that didn't go down very well with him at all. Knowing that Oliver was comfortable and enjoying himself made me happy and comfortable with our choice. 

Routine 
Does the nursery you want to send your child to have any kind of routine in place? Where we have chosen to send Oliver has a routine in place for throughout the day as well as the opportunity to for the children to engage in free flow play as periods throughout the day. Which was another big tick for us as we want Oliver to play, have fun and make friends but we also want him to know the importance of a routine and doing other things beside play like picking up and tidying up after himself which they teach them as a part of their routine. 

Facilities/Activities  
What are their facilities like? Again Oliver's pre-school also ticked all the boxes on this one! They have both indoor and outdoor facilities that are available to the children all throughout the day weather permitting. Their outdoor part has things like the little tikes cars, playhouses, sand and water play and a mud kitchen which I know Oliver will love as he enjoys playing outside and getting messy. Indoors they have the facilities for all-sorts of art and crafts which are set up so your child can choose whether they want to do them or not. They have a quite area filled with books and music for nursery rhymes all of this ticked major boxes for us as it gives Oliver a variety of things to do. They also have all the things that will help aid Oliver with his potty training when we get back into starting it. 

Staff
How do the staff come across? Are they interacting with the children? Are they playing with the children and helping them if they need help? Again this ticked all the boxes for us! When we went for our visit all the staff were so lovely and actually got down to Oliver's level and spoke to him. All the children seemed happy interacting with all the members of staff and asking for help if they needed it. The pre-school also has members of staff trained in several areas such as SENCO, behaviour specialist and a speech and language specialist ect. 

Safeguarding 
How safe does it feel? Before you even get into nursery you have to get through two locked doors that both have pass-codes only members of staff know. They have also have a system in place for when other members of family pick your child up which is a password that only you and who you choose to tell it too will know. They also like to know who is picking up you child in advance and also like to meet them beforehand so they have a face to a name. They also have a closed Facebook group so they can share pictures of your children with from activities and sessions they've done without risking your children's safety so you can stay updated at all times. 

A few other key things that ticked the boxes for us were; 

• They do regular parents evenings and send reports home everyday with things that you child has done and achieved. 
• They do things such a themed days throughout the year (when Oliver went for his settling in session it was national sandwich day so all the children were making sandwiches), they do bonnet competitions at Easter and do a nativity a Christmas. 
• They start work with things such as letters, number and colour with the younger children Oliver's age so they get a head start in those areas.  

I hope you've enjoyed this post of my key points to look out for when choosing a nursery/preschool and that you find it helpful if you're going through the same process we've just gone through. 

Siblings-the definition that comprises love, strife, competition and forever friends.

My  2 beautiful babies I don't even know where to start whatsoever So I'll just go with what's in my heart and I'll start by saying how proud I am when I look at you 2 I think damn I've created 2 absolutely beautiful children. 

Oliver; When Daddy and I first decided we wanted to add a sibling to our family for you, we weren't sure you were only 1 and I don't know I felt guilty and I didn't want you to think we were replacing you and that we didn't want, we wanted you to still feel just as loved and wanted. When I found out I was pregnant you weren't quite 2 yet but you loved the idea of mummy has a baby and loved showing my belly to people, you were stunned to silence when you first saw the baby on the screen you didn't understand that was going to be your baby brother or sister, you didn't understand how someone could see into mummy's belly and you couldn't. When you sister came along you we so besotted and all you did was kiss her and want to just grab her, you asked why she cried and if she was okay and you'd tell her I love and in that moment you just grew up! You weren't a baby anymore you'd suddenly grown up in a little boy and that you are you are a proper little boy! You run, you climb you laugh, you tumble and sometimes you fall but when you fall I will always pick you back up. I'm proud of who you are becoming I'm proud how you've taken to having a little sister, just the other day I lay her on our bed whilst I went to fetch something for her and you cuddled up to her, placed your hands on her and some how made her fall back to sleep amongst all her crying and there you both lay sound asleep.

Luna; I honestly can't believe you've been in this world for 5 weeks and what an amazing 5 weeks those have been. You have been our rainbow after the storm. Your lucky to have just know love and joy to know those who are the most important in your life! You have some incredible people in your life that I know will always be there if I am ever not. I want you to know how much your brother loves you even thought when your both older you will probably end up fighting like cat and dog and when you're even older you'll understand the importance of siblings. I hope that one day Oliver will be there to wipe your tears as much as I am and to get mad at that boy that broke your heart as much as daddy is. I can't wait to watch you grown into a strong independent woman who know no bounds and that you will always stand up for what you believe in! 

I hope that both of you will express yourselves and not be afraid to be who you want to be me and daddy certainly didn't stay to the confines of normal!. I hope that your not defined by what other people think is right and that you have the right to love who you want, dress how you want, live and be who you want to be with no boundaries. 

Love you always to the moon and back 

x

Luna's 4 Week Update!

So it't that time of the week again which is Luna's update! This week Ben went back to work so I've been thrown in at the deep end with both little squishes and I'd be lying if I said it hasn't been hard! 
This week Luna has started becoming even more restless in the night and doesn't seem to be settling at night. She's really having trouble bring up her wind and the moment and is getting so so uncomfortable bless her! So we're gonna try her on some Infacol or some Coleif to see if that helps her a bit. She seems okay with during the day and worse with it at night, I think because the rocker we put her in during the day has a little bit of an angle to it and obviously the moses basket is flat.

We've also had a trip to the GP this week as she's had a bit of a gunky eye for a while, they seem to think that she has a bit of a blocked tear duct so we've been given some eye drops to try and unblock it they've also sent off a swab to make sure that its not anything nasty that requires anything like antibiotics but we haven't heard back so I'm assuming no news is good news! 
Routine-wise we've just upped her bottles to 5oz and she didn't seem to be settling and was still getting hungry after downing the 4oz, also now that her oral thrush has cleared up I've also managed to get her to latch back on to breast surprisingly! I'd noticed a couple of days ago that my boobs had begun leaking again for some unknown reason so I thought that I'd try my luck and she latched back on straight away! I've decided to give myself so much pressure this time so I've decided to offer her breast and then top her up with a bottle depending on how well and how long she feeds from me for but the last couple of days she's been feeding from me for around 10 - 20 minutes and then taking about 3 - 4 oz from the bottle, we're also exclusively feeding from bottle during the night as that's when she's the fussiest and gets hungry and worked up the most at the moment! So I figured that would save her any more distress when she's trying to latch on when she's really hungry! 

I hope you've enjoyed my 5 week update for my Luna bug and I'll be back next week when she'll be five weeks! 

Me and Mine | May 2018

This month saw us literally rocket through Luna's first month and when I say rocket I really do mean it! 

Our full photo this month is the morning we took our first family holiday its not the best but its filled with so much love and excitement. Ben and I are exhausted because isn't everyone when you have a newborn and a toddler and Oliver isn't even looking at the camera but instead looking at his sister with so much love but I don't care that it doesn't look perfect it captures our family how it is tired but filled with love. 
We also had our first family holiday as a family of 4 this month and it wasn't as awful and stressful as I thought it would be. We jollied off to Butlins Minehead this month for a just for tots break and whilst Luna had absolutely no clue what was happening, Oliver had an absolute whale of a time, he had his first proper experience of sand and thought that it would be hilarious to sit in the wet sand at the bottom of the beach. He repeatedly rode the same rides and had a few tantrums because he had to get off and let other children have a go but other than that it was wonderful to see him so so happy and just loving life. 

This month also saw Ben leave us and go back to work after having 5 weeks. He started his time off a 3 and ended it as 4 and it has been a massive adjustment not just for me and getting into that routine with both babies, but also for him not being with us 24/7 and being away from us for several hours a day and Oliver has had to adjust to daddy not being here all the time. 

I hope you've enjoyed my first month taking part in the me and mine project and I'm looking forward to taking part every month from now on! 

Postpartum Update

So I'm writing this a 4 weeks postpartum and well I feel pretty good if I'm honest! Ben has gone back to work now so that was quite a big adjustment and I have gotten upset a couple of times but I don't think that there's really anything underlying to it, I think my emotions were just a bit all over the place because it was the first time I'd been properly on my own in 5 weeks and the first time I'd had both children by myself so I was a little bit overwhelmed! I have struggled I'll admit that as I'm trying to find that routine that's mine with both of them and it feels like Oliver has just acted up for the sake of it but he's started calming down a bit now as Ben has just entered his second week back at work. 
Physically I feel really good the bleeding has all stopped now so now I'm just waiting for the appearance of mother nature (yay)  and I'm dreading it because anyone reading this will know how awful your first proper period after giving birth is! 

I'm also still trying to work on loving what my body looks like after 2 beautiful children but it's hard there's so much that I want to change and that I'm working on changing! Admittedly I've eaten nothing but junk since Ben has gone back to work as it's been grab it as and when I can just to say I've eaten something and it has been a bag of crisps or a handful of biscuits with a cup of tea not exactly the best diet! but I am working on changing that! I've got bit that are wobbly and I'm riddled with stretchmarks and my body has been filled with that much junk my skin is literally swearing at me right now! I'm also still on iron tablets as my levels are still low but hopefully when I go for my blood test next week they are happy for me to come off them! 
I've also been having a little think about contraception as after everything as much as I love my 2 beautiful squishes I'd love to not have anymore right now haha! I know that I don't want anything heavily hormone based so I'm think maybe the copper coil as it stays there until you want it or need it out and it doesn't release any hormones! So I shall see what my GP says when I go for my 6 -8 week check!

Hello everyone I'm back again for Luna's 3 week update! Time really does seem to be flying by I'm writing this on Sunday night feeling a little bit anxious if I'm honest as Ben goes back to work tomorrow and even though I've done it before I'm getting myself a bit worked up about being left on my own with both babies. Anyway I think that's one more for my postpartum update so on to Luna! 

Lucky little lady has had her first holiday this week! Granted that it was only a 5 day break to Butlins at Minehead but it was just so lovely to get away for a few days and relax by the sea. She's been slightly unsettled this week I'm not sure if its the fact we were in a new place or whether she's going through a growth spurt we're not too sure but hopefully she starts settling a bit better again soon! 
We're not sure how much she weighs this week as we don't see the health visitor again for another couple of weeks but she definitely feels like she's filling out and she no longer fits in newborn and some first size clothes so I take that as a sign she's putting on weight nicely! 
Again this week she's starting to get more aware of her surroundings and she's even trying to lift her head up slightly so we've started on giving her a bit of tummy time. We've also started introducing some toys in as well mainly noisy ones that she's beginning to respond too! I also think she's starting to crack the odd smile here or there but I know deep down its probably wind as they say as she is a rather windy madame when she wants to be especially from the bottom end which is quite funny when she passes wind I think she startles herself and pulls some quite funny faces bless her!

Routine-wise we're trying to work out a routine that works best between her and Oliver, we've just started bathing them together which at the moment is working out quite well. She has her last bottle of the night around 10pm and then doesn't wake up till around 2 am roughly then she'll sleep again till about 5 - 6 am. She's currently on 4oz bottles every 3 - 4 hours roughly. We had her first proper unsettled night this week too I'm hoping that this was just a one off and she settles back down. 
I think that's it for this week really so I shall see you all in my next update about little Luna! 

Hello everyone I thought that in this post I would do a how to entertain a toddler on a long car journey. We've just come back from Butlins in Minehead which is a two hour car journey for us which for Oliver who is two and half can be quite long and boring so we've obviously had to keep him entertained for the whole time and try to avoid any kind of meltdown. I'm hoping this will be helpful to any other parents with children of similar age when travelling on long car journeys! Let crack on then shall we! 

1. Snacks and Drinks! 

Snacks and Drinks are a must for any car journey especially with a 2 year old. You know how cranky then can get if they go too long with out food or drink and you don't really want to end up stopping off at the service stations and spending extortionate amounts of money on food and drink so I made sure to pack some of Oliver's favourites in his bag for this trip I packed some of the Bear YoYo fruity wind up snacks and some of the Fruit Bowl Strawberry Fruity Bars, 2 of Oliver's firm favourites! I also made sure to fill up a couple of Oliver's drinks bottles with his favourite juice for the journey. 

2. BBC Kids iPlayer App

I recently downloading this to my iPhone after it was recommended by a few people on one of the mum's advice and support groups I'm part of, which is fab as Cbeebies has so many shows that Oliver loves to watch like Bing, Octonauts, RaRa the noisy Lion and Hey Duggee (I on purpose avoided the stick episode mind you! hehe) 

3.Toys
I also made sure to pop a couple of Oliver's favourite toys in the bag that I had in the back of the car, I think we ended up packing Hoppity Voosh and Bing as he really loves those too. He in the end fell asleep for a good hour of our journey cuddling those two. 

4. Regular Stops 
We also made sure to stop at least once on the journey so he could get out stretch his legs and have little run around the service station, we also used this opportunity to change nappies and Luna also had a bottle. 

I hope you've enjoyed my quickfire tips on how to survive a log car journey with a toddler and I hope that those of you who are about to brave your own long journey with children have found this helpful! 

Well I can't beleive that I'm writing Luna's 2 week update already! She's defintely coming on in leaps and bounds and it's amazing to think how much she's growing. I'll start with her weight she's almost back to her birth weight now so formula is defintely doing it's job pefectly for her and she hasn't been sick as much as when she was on the normal apatamil milk. She now weighs 8lbs 8oz which is amazing and its much nicer and less stressful knowing that I've got total control of how much she's drinking unlike the breastfeeding where she was just on my breast and losing weight instead of gaining. We met her health visitor for the first time this week who seems lovely, she came along for her first home visit and did her weight, length and head circumference - she's 54cm long and her head circumferance is 37.7 cm. 

Her cord also fell of around day 12 so little lady was able to have her first bath finally as top and tailing wasn't quite doing the job and she had some awfully dry skin which seems to now of improved now she can be bathed properly. I've inserted a picture below from her first bath and she only looks so unhappy because she actually fell asleep during and slept through the whole thing and then got stroppy because we took her out to dry and dress her.

She's also becoming so much more aware everyday and opening her eyes more and more and she's also starting to interact with me, daddy and her brother more by grabbing hold of things like our hands and hair. 

I hope you enjoyed Luna's 2 week update and we shall see you again in a few days time for her 3 week update! 

Well I'm braving the update about me! I'm not going to lie I'm feeling a little bit wobbly about the whole thing (no pun intended!) and I'm already getting worked up. I debated whether or not to share an update about myself because I knew I'd end up getting upset but then I thought why not my body has done something amazing for the 2nd time. I've got a way to go in loving myself and how my body has changed in the last almost 3 years.

Mentally
Mentally I feel in a really good place, I feel really happy and I'm embracing the changes from one little to two, which in all honestly I haven't found that difficult or challenging but I'm sure there will be moments where things aren't going to be so easy. I have had a bit of cry over stopping breastfeeding as I felt like a bit of a failure but then I realised that as long as Luna is fed and gaining weight it doesn't matter how she is fed.

Physically 
Physically I stopped bleeding around Day 8 which was wonderful I think the hormone drip they gave me after delivery helped with how long I bled for to be honest. I'm currently on a course of iron tablets as I'd lost a litre of blood and I'm due to go back to the doctors again in a couple of weeks to have my full blood count taken again to see where my levels are at but the doctors think I'll need the tablets for around three months to get my levels back to a normal level. The couple of stitches that I had for the tiny tear a pretty much healed now although I couldn't really tell that they were there and I couldn't tell I'd tore to be honest. Something I had forgotten was how awful the after birth sweats are and in the weather, they've not been to bad but I have had the odd one for no reason and gosh doesn't it make you feel gross. All my swelling has all gone now too and I'd gained the most awful puffy fingers, ankles and feet.

Body Image
Body image is the massive one for me at the moment, I know that my body has done something incredible again but its so hard to like what you see in the mirror and embrace how you look when other people are so quick to judge you and comment on how well you've snapped back, although I have definitely lost some kind of weight as some of my clothes fit better than they did before I fell pregnant with Luna I still feel that pressure to snap back. My boobs feel like I've got two massive uncomfortable bowling balls strapped to my chest as I'm no longer breastfeeding or expressing so I'm still leaking a little bit and I'm just waiting for my supply to dry up.

I don't really feel comfortable with sharing a picture just yet mainly because my hair is a big grease ball that needs washing and I'm writing this in my Pj's with my hair piled on top of my head, maybe I'll share one next week if I feel a bit more comfortable and I still don't look pregnant haha!

Thank you so much for reading and I'll be back in my 3 week postpartum update! 

I'm Back

So I've been away for a little while you may remember I left off with a pregnancy update. Well after a complicated last few weeks where I've neglected my blog completely we've finally welcomed our beautiful little girl Luna Jane Brooks into the world at 11.23 am on the 26th of April weighing in at 8lbs 8oz. I'm just so relieved that she's finally here after so much happened in the last few weeks of my pregnancy with many hospital stays, steroid injections, high blood pressure, Group B Strep infection, bleeding and testing positive for pre term labour she's finally here safely. 

Anyway I am back and I have a load of new content ready to post and that I'm working on and I'm hoping to get my mojo back a bit . 

So this week has been an all over the place week really. I had the hospital and growth scan on Wednesday which left me feeling a bit emotional if I'm honest so I think I'm gonna get straight into that and get that over and done with, first off baby girl is doing great and according to measurements is weighing in a 2lbs 3oz which is following the average nicely, so that's the good news. All my stats I think that's what they call them are all fine it's when it came to everything else, my midwife at my GP surgery had told me that I didn't need my bloods doing at 28 weeks but when I went to the hospital they asked why I hadn't had them done so I ended up getting sent over to get those done, we also spoke about my GTT and how I've been too sick to do it and was told as I had GD in my pregnancy with Ollie I was supposed to of started testing straight away my midwife at the GP hadn't told me that either and had just referred me to have the test at 28 weeks but thankfully all that's been sorted I've got an appointment at 29 weeks to see the diabetes team at the hospital to start testing my blood and I don't have to have the test and make myself poorly. I tick a few of the boxes when it comes to the GTT as my mum has type 2 diabetes, my BMI is high and due to my PCOS can cause insulin resistance so I ended up getting quite stressed and practically breaking down and having a cry. When it came to seeing my consultant she was lovely and told me not to stress although she told me to be extra careful due to the positioning of my placenta and told me that first sign of any bleeding or pain I was to get to the hospital and be checked over an that we would discuss my birth options once I've had another scan a 34 weeks to check to see if my placenta has moved any more or not. In all honesty I don't really care how Luna enters this world as long as she's safe and healthy I think I'm more stressed over the recovery from a section when Ben goes back to work and I'm left with both the kids. I think that's about everything in regards to appointments so on to how I'm feeling otherwise! Well little lady is playing the engaging in and out game and boy don't I know about it! I literally feel as if I'm walking with something between my legs all the time! Some days also feel like she's trying to kick her way out. I'm still sick and nauseous but I'm just trying my best to soilder on with it and not let it get the best of me. My sleeping patterns are also completely screwed too and I'm just so exhausted all the time and a bit groggy! Ben can vouch for that one! I'm sorry I'm not very nice to be around at the moment!
I think that's everything for this week so I shall leave you all with my 28 week belly which if I'm honest I feel utterly huge! Thank you so much for reading and I see you all in my next update at 29 weeks!

I don't quite get how I'm writing this but this is my 26/27 week pregnancy update! I've decided to combine the two because the last couple of weeks have been a bit of a blur and I'm just so exhausted all the time. I literally can't quite believe that we're not that far off from single digits. I also don't think the possibility of us meeting this little lady any sooner than her due date has sunk in either. I am so very excited but also nervous and I still have no clue how she's actually going to be entering the world yet either and I won't know for a few more weeks yet. I'm hoping my placenta has shifted a bit so I'll be able to have her naturally, I'm not so scared about the actual procedure as I've had loads of surgery before for ongoing issues I have with my stomach anyway, I'm just more worried about the recovery process and being able to cope with both little ones once Ben goes back to work after she's born. 

This week I have been an absolute emotional wreck mainly because we've been looking at Pre-Schools for Oliver to start in the next few weeks, I know deep in my heart that it's going to be amazing for him and his development and also will mean I'll have a few hours in the day where he'll be out to get things in check during the last few weeks of this pregnancy and be able to get a tiny bit of rest but he's still my baby and it terrifies me that he's growing up so quickly but I'll go into that in a separate post maybe just after this one has gone up. 
This week I've also had a really achy crotch for some unknown reason! I don't know why I don't think it's anything to do with Braxton Hicks it just aches in general. I'm just worried its a sign of her trying to come early. I know it probably isn't but I am a terrible over thinker at the best of times.
I'm still getting sickness and nausea on and off throughout the day and if I'm lucky I'll have a day or 2 throughout the week where I won't be sick. I have my GTT next week and I'm absolutely dreading it if I'm honest as I'm still being so sick and I've been to the doctor's about it but I don't feel like I'm doing taken seriously. I also have the consultant and a growth scan next week as well which I'm looking forward to seeing this little lady again so next week is probably going to be quite a bit update! I'm feeling in a much better heaspace this week Ben has just been such a rock and listened to me vent and have a good cry. 

I don't really have much else to say really so I think I'll leave you all with a picture of my bump and I shall see you in my next update! 

Oliver's 2 Year Update

So we're a little bit late to the party shall we say. We're almost 4 months into Oliver being 2, so we're pretty much doing a 2 and half year update. Where do I begin!

Growth

I don't have any of his weight and height stats because he hasn't been weighed for while. He's currently in size 2-3 year clothing mainly because of his height, he still fits into a few of his 18 – 24 months clothes, he's not grown of them weight wise its mainly height and length wise you can see that things like jeans still fit perfectly around his waist but they bite at his ankles, its the same with tops and jumpers ect they fit perfectly around his belly and shoulders but are too short in the arm whereas the bigger size looks baggy but fit perfectly length-wise.

Development

Development wise I think he's doing incredibly well. He talks and has a wide range of vocabulary. He strings words together but only 2 or 3 at a time so we're currently working on that with him. Motor skill wise he's doing brilliantly he can hold a pen, pencil or crayon perfectly and draw (my living room walls are proof of that one!), he is able to use a fork ad spoon effectively we're working on him being able to use a knife. He enjoys using the tool kit he received as a gift for Christmas to repair his cars and other toys. He is also able to get press all the small buttons on his toys and find the switches to turn them on and off. He also enjoys doing the same with the light switches the cheeky devil! He can currently count to 3, he also seems to have a thing for colour yellow I don't know why (probably because its the colour of Rubble from the paw patrol!) He's able to jump especially when it comes to lovely big muddy puddles! He's also good at throwing and will climb absolutely anything and everything if we let him! We've got his developmental review at the end of the month so we shall see how he gets on then too. 

Routine

We have a routine that we try to stick to as much as we can, some days we stick to it, other days it goes completely out the window. Oliver tends to wake up around 6.30/7am most days. He no longer naps anymore only occasionally napping in the car or buggy if we're out. It's just something he's cut out himself, some days he's okay and other days we get to just before teatime and he's got a massive grump on because he's tired. He then has dinner about 5/5.30 has a bath and then we settle him down to bed about 6.30. He still has a bottle of milk that for bed that we put him to bed with and he'll often only drink half of it before falling asleep. Sometimes he'll wake up in the night and sometimes he doesn't.

He's completely obsessed with Paw Patrol, Fireman Sam and Bing at the moment, he's at that stage where if we watch anything especially Fireman Sam he grabs his fire truck climbs up on to me or Ben at that's where he stays.

He's definitely in the terrible two's giving us attitude, he knows what he wants and knows how to get it the cheeky devil. He's incredibly stubborn sometimes but then that's what you get when me and Ben are his parents. When he's not being all of the above he's loving kind caring and especially loves pulling up my top to kiss my belly where his little sister is nestled up at the moment. 

We've got his 2 year check at the end of the month, so we shall see how he gets on with that and if there's any more to update you on. 

24 Week Pregnancy Update

This week is a pretty big one! We've reached viability which means if baby girl was to be born now she'd have a chance at survival. Given how I've felt recently in regards to all the anxiety I've had surrounding this pregnancy and I've been in a massive battle with my head and convinced myself that for some reason we're not going to be coming home with her, this week has been a big one for me because I know she'll have a chance. 

This week I've still not really seen an improvement in how I've felt sickness and nausea wise. On the plus side I've gained no actually weight (yet!) We're also getting to a point in a sort of routine with her kicking (and punching!) she especially loves to kick me in the middle of the night when I've just got comfy again the little madam! I've also still got the most awful back, hip and leg ache when I try and do too much during the day or if I've been on my feet most of the day.

We've also finished getting all the big buys we need for her the most recent being her new travel system. We decided on the iCandy Strawberry 2 in Smoothie, its such a gorgeous colour its almost a dusty rose colour and not too pink. We've not put in together yet as we don't have the space to store it at the moment until I've finished clearing our home out but once we do I may do a couple of reviews on it, I'll probably do a first impressions then a review when she's actually here and we've properly used it. 

I think that's everything for this week. I hope you've enjoyed my my update and I shall see you all in my next update. 

23 Week Pregnancy Update

Hello Everyone this is my 23 week pregnancy update!
This week has been a pretty quiet week this week in regards to anything new!
I am still being and feeling incredibly sick but just seem to keep being fobbed off by my doctor, so I've been pretty much left to it and I'm just trying to deal with it. 
I also believe I'm growing a future Olympian by the way she kicks and flips and prods at me. I'm still suffering with terrible back ache, its worse after a long day where I've been on my feet loads so I seem to be jumping in the bath with some bath salts and relaxing for ages once Oliver goes to bed of an evening. Oliver is really embracing that he's going to be having a little sister too, he still enjoys pulling my top up and keeps trying to say her name but can't so she LuLu at the moment and it makes my heart all warm and fuzzy and a tiny bit weepy. I know he's going to be a great big brother he does have his moments but he's so loving. 
I think that all I have to say really so I'm just going to leave you with a bump picture and I shall be back next week for a new update!

22 Week Pregnancy Update!

This week has been a bit all over the place! 
I had another scan this week because we couldn't get all the measurement that were needed for my anomaly scan as baby girl was being stubborn (just like her brother!) my placenta has moved but only slightly so I'm being scanned again at 34 weeks which then the decision will be made to whether I need a c-section or not. I've been getting worked up about the whole thing but the more I've thought about it the more I've become more accepting to it. As long as our baby girl gets here safe and sound then it doesn't matter how she get here! 
This little lady is also a major wriggler she just doesn't stop! I feel like I'm growing a  gymnast in there at the moment! She's also weighing in at around a 1lb based off of
her measurements that were taken at the scan. 
I'm also still being really sick at the moment as well and everything still also heaving at some certain smells and I think I'm only eating at the moment because I have to. I've also been suffering with a UTI this week which as been dreadful and really knocked me about. I've also had the appearance of the much dreaded back and hip ache which I had with Ollie. I also think that waddle has begun Ben pointed that out to me the other day and keeps singing the goose song to me from The Aristocats the git!

I think that is pretty much it for this week! Thank you for popping by and reading!